So the little girl I babysit has been having some 'growing pains' lately. She screams and cries instead of using her words or body language to communicate, and she's definitely used to getting her way when she's screaming and throwing her tantrums.
I've been working with her the last two weeks (translation: sitting through hours of screaming and trantrum throwing without doing anything to get her to understand the screaming and tantrums will get her no where) and I'm proud to report that she's going to bed without too much fuss and she's also choosing to point and reach for things instead of scream. I'm so proud of her!! She's a much happier baby as a result, too. (In part, I would wager, from the fact that she no longer has crying/screaming headaches and is fully hydrated again!)
Saturday, June 23, 2007
Dream about the Simpson Sisters
This is how tired I am this week from working some crazy hours...
I dreamt that I was on a school bus headed somewhere, and Jessica Simpson was on it. We stopped for gas, and Ashlee Simpson walked beside the window where I was sitting. I asked her what she was listening to on her hot pink Ipod Nano. She gave it to me and said, "You want to hear it? I have a ton of these on my tour bus."
Then Jessica spent the rest of the trip trying to get me to give it to her so she could give it back to her sister.
I dreamt that I was on a school bus headed somewhere, and Jessica Simpson was on it. We stopped for gas, and Ashlee Simpson walked beside the window where I was sitting. I asked her what she was listening to on her hot pink Ipod Nano. She gave it to me and said, "You want to hear it? I have a ton of these on my tour bus."
Then Jessica spent the rest of the trip trying to get me to give it to her so she could give it back to her sister.
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Monday, June 18, 2007
A Blog Post on my MySpace One Year Ago...and an update...
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
There's a Freaking SQUIRREL in my Apt!!
That's right, folks, there's a squirrel in my apartment. Right now. In my living room. Let me back up....
7:15 pm: I was finishing up making my own breakfast bars (my own recipe for a high-protein, high-fiber breakfasty, granola-y, Cliff-bar-y, breakfast bar) and patting them in the pan. I hear this bizarre, LOUD noise coming from the living room. I go investigate.
7:17 pm: Said noise is coming from the chimney pipe. There's definitely an animal in there, who keeps trying to climb back up the stovepipe, and then slides back down, turning the flue a bit each time with its body-weight. It's a free-standing pot-belly fireplace, with black stovepipe up and through the ceiling. I notice that the flue is turned half way. I begin to panic and ask myself, "if I try to 'shut' the flue all the way, will I inadvertantly open it?" Meanwhile my brain is screaming, "Shut all the bedroom and closet doors bc you ARE NOT sharing your bed with an animal!"
7:20 pm: Run around apartment, shutting all doors and calling for roommate Kyoko to come out and help.
7:22 pm: Watch as Squirrel proceeds to try to climb up the pipe, AGAIN, and it's body weight on the fall down pops the flue open the rest of the way. Dazed and confused Bullwinkle daintily (and in slow motion) steps out of fireplace into living room. When he realizes he's not outside, he panics.
7:23 pm: I call the non-emergency line and they put in an emergency call to Animal Control to come out and capture the crazy rabid squirrel who has just taken over my house.
7:25 pm: Roommate Kyoko and I put up a 'barricade' to try to keep the squirrel contained to the living room. We did allow space so that we could try to 'shoo' the squirrel out into the stairwell, down the stairs, and out the front door. (Yes, I know squirrels like to climb - I just needed some sort of wall to help me feel like I could control its location.)
7:30 pm: I head downstairs to hold open front door while Kyoko tries to shoo the squirrel out with a broom.
7:31 pm: Squirrel has reached panic point. Said squirrel repeatedly hurls itself at our Lazyboy, catapults itself off the the seat like its a squirrel-sized trampoline, and smashes into the window glass as he tries to leap outside. Squirrel falls down, winds up and leaps again. This happened five times before Kyoko stopped counting.
8:25pm: I call the non-emergency number to see if they got lost. The City of Chicago graciously informed me that Animal Control is 'done with work for the day by 9:30.' If they don't make it to their calls before then, you're out of luck. I ask them, "Okay...what am I supposed to do with this squirrel between now and tomorrow morning?" They said, "I don't know."
8:30 pm: I head upstairs to deliver the news to Kyoko, and decide to take matters into my own hands. I go get a mop (bc it has the longest handle) and head into the living room. All I can see is Clark Griswold, with his entire family behind him, when he's trying to capture the squirrel who came into his house on the Christmas tree. I also am seeing John Candy and Dan Akroyd, in that movie where they are staying in a cabin in the woods, and they are trying to capture a bat. Both rodents, both with catapult powers, both with teeth...I'm a little freaked out.
8:31 pm: I head in. I begin banging all the furniture, pushing the pieces around with the pole of the mop. I'm crawling all over the daggone living room and can't find the squirrel, anywhere. I begin to question Kyoko, 'Is it possible the the squirrel ran out of the living room? Do you think it knocked itself out on its last catapult/crash into the glass?' I get braver and braver in my search for the squirrel, until I relive that scene from Christmas Vacation where the squirrel is on Clark's back, and I freak out all over again.
8:40 pm: I call my Dad. His advice involved laughter and these two comments: "well, it's not going to do you much good until you find the squirrel,' and "why don't you flush it out by putting some peanut butter out in the living room?" Thanks a lot, Charles.
8:42 pm: I call Jim Dekker, my boss, who is an outdoor enthusiast. He and his wife confer, and he totally youth pastored me. I loved it! He said, "See, squirrels want to climb when they're scared. Remember, it's way more scared than you right now. It's probably clinging to the bottom of the couch, and that's why you couldn't find it. Open two windows..just two or three inches...and make sure something is in front of it that the squirrel can climb to get out. Put the peanut butter on the window sill. Turn all the lights off, and go to your room. He'll settle down and come out eventually. The sucky part is going to be that you're not going to know when it leaves. I know...I know...there's comfort in knowing that he's gone. Are you going to be okay?" I appreciate you, Jim and Christine Dekker!
8:50 pm: Kyoko and I go in, one last time, to open windows, set up the peanut butter, and shut off the lights. Oh yes, and to close the flue.
9 pm: I call information, trying to locate my landlord at their vacation home in Lake Geneva, where they're staying all summer. See, it occurred to me that the grate on the roof is broken, and that's how our friend ended up in the fireplace, in the first place. I can't locate my landlord. Heave 100th deep sigh of the night, and contemplate laughter vs tears. I really, really don't want a squirrel in my apartment.
9:30 pm: My other roommate, Jenny, gets my message about the squirrel, and calls me on her way home from work. I inform her that first thing tomorrow morning, we're getting the ladders out, climbing on the roof, and putting some plywood on top of the chimney grate. I will not be chasing any other critters around my apartment. This ain't no petting zoo!
10 pm: Best friend Amy phones me, and gets pissed at the City of Chicago for not coming out. I believe her exact words were, "What, like there's an epidemic of squirrels who fell down chimneys into people's living rooms tonight? They couldn't come in TWO HOURS?" She then proceeds to tell me that: a) "what if the squirrel is in your bed right now?, b) "Charles would have suggested that you shoot the squirrel, and then you'd have blood all over your living room," c) "you don't need to get on the roof, Alison Joy Burkhardt, because you are known for hurting yourself doing stupid things. Do I need to remind you about the slip n slide knee injury?' d) "There's a f***** squirrel in your living room!" e) "Don't feed the squirrel peanut butter, Alison. What's it going to learn, but that you're willing to feed it three squares a day?!?!" e) "I was at Megan's house when you called and left me the message about the squirrel. I tried text-messaging her to let her know that there was a squirrel in your house." (We went to high school with Megan.) and f) "This one is going down as one of my favorite Alison stories - up until now my favorite Alison story has been the Unfortunate Ohio Incident. You need to blog that one."
My one regret of the evening is that I did not get a picture of the squirrel. The best I could do was locate the video on my home page, which did make me laugh until I snorted. It also made me go, "If that squirrel doesn't get out of my house, I'm going to have to move." Enjoy!
I'm just glad that my squirrel wasn't of the German variety...
There's a Freaking SQUIRREL in my Apt!!
That's right, folks, there's a squirrel in my apartment. Right now. In my living room. Let me back up....
7:15 pm: I was finishing up making my own breakfast bars (my own recipe for a high-protein, high-fiber breakfasty, granola-y, Cliff-bar-y, breakfast bar) and patting them in the pan. I hear this bizarre, LOUD noise coming from the living room. I go investigate.
7:17 pm: Said noise is coming from the chimney pipe. There's definitely an animal in there, who keeps trying to climb back up the stovepipe, and then slides back down, turning the flue a bit each time with its body-weight. It's a free-standing pot-belly fireplace, with black stovepipe up and through the ceiling. I notice that the flue is turned half way. I begin to panic and ask myself, "if I try to 'shut' the flue all the way, will I inadvertantly open it?" Meanwhile my brain is screaming, "Shut all the bedroom and closet doors bc you ARE NOT sharing your bed with an animal!"
7:20 pm: Run around apartment, shutting all doors and calling for roommate Kyoko to come out and help.
7:22 pm: Watch as Squirrel proceeds to try to climb up the pipe, AGAIN, and it's body weight on the fall down pops the flue open the rest of the way. Dazed and confused Bullwinkle daintily (and in slow motion) steps out of fireplace into living room. When he realizes he's not outside, he panics.
7:23 pm: I call the non-emergency line and they put in an emergency call to Animal Control to come out and capture the crazy rabid squirrel who has just taken over my house.
7:25 pm: Roommate Kyoko and I put up a 'barricade' to try to keep the squirrel contained to the living room. We did allow space so that we could try to 'shoo' the squirrel out into the stairwell, down the stairs, and out the front door. (Yes, I know squirrels like to climb - I just needed some sort of wall to help me feel like I could control its location.)
7:30 pm: I head downstairs to hold open front door while Kyoko tries to shoo the squirrel out with a broom.
7:31 pm: Squirrel has reached panic point. Said squirrel repeatedly hurls itself at our Lazyboy, catapults itself off the the seat like its a squirrel-sized trampoline, and smashes into the window glass as he tries to leap outside. Squirrel falls down, winds up and leaps again. This happened five times before Kyoko stopped counting.
8:25pm: I call the non-emergency number to see if they got lost. The City of Chicago graciously informed me that Animal Control is 'done with work for the day by 9:30.' If they don't make it to their calls before then, you're out of luck. I ask them, "Okay...what am I supposed to do with this squirrel between now and tomorrow morning?" They said, "I don't know."
8:30 pm: I head upstairs to deliver the news to Kyoko, and decide to take matters into my own hands. I go get a mop (bc it has the longest handle) and head into the living room. All I can see is Clark Griswold, with his entire family behind him, when he's trying to capture the squirrel who came into his house on the Christmas tree. I also am seeing John Candy and Dan Akroyd, in that movie where they are staying in a cabin in the woods, and they are trying to capture a bat. Both rodents, both with catapult powers, both with teeth...I'm a little freaked out.
8:31 pm: I head in. I begin banging all the furniture, pushing the pieces around with the pole of the mop. I'm crawling all over the daggone living room and can't find the squirrel, anywhere. I begin to question Kyoko, 'Is it possible the the squirrel ran out of the living room? Do you think it knocked itself out on its last catapult/crash into the glass?' I get braver and braver in my search for the squirrel, until I relive that scene from Christmas Vacation where the squirrel is on Clark's back, and I freak out all over again.
8:40 pm: I call my Dad. His advice involved laughter and these two comments: "well, it's not going to do you much good until you find the squirrel,' and "why don't you flush it out by putting some peanut butter out in the living room?" Thanks a lot, Charles.
8:42 pm: I call Jim Dekker, my boss, who is an outdoor enthusiast. He and his wife confer, and he totally youth pastored me. I loved it! He said, "See, squirrels want to climb when they're scared. Remember, it's way more scared than you right now. It's probably clinging to the bottom of the couch, and that's why you couldn't find it. Open two windows..just two or three inches...and make sure something is in front of it that the squirrel can climb to get out. Put the peanut butter on the window sill. Turn all the lights off, and go to your room. He'll settle down and come out eventually. The sucky part is going to be that you're not going to know when it leaves. I know...I know...there's comfort in knowing that he's gone. Are you going to be okay?" I appreciate you, Jim and Christine Dekker!
8:50 pm: Kyoko and I go in, one last time, to open windows, set up the peanut butter, and shut off the lights. Oh yes, and to close the flue.
9 pm: I call information, trying to locate my landlord at their vacation home in Lake Geneva, where they're staying all summer. See, it occurred to me that the grate on the roof is broken, and that's how our friend ended up in the fireplace, in the first place. I can't locate my landlord. Heave 100th deep sigh of the night, and contemplate laughter vs tears. I really, really don't want a squirrel in my apartment.
9:30 pm: My other roommate, Jenny, gets my message about the squirrel, and calls me on her way home from work. I inform her that first thing tomorrow morning, we're getting the ladders out, climbing on the roof, and putting some plywood on top of the chimney grate. I will not be chasing any other critters around my apartment. This ain't no petting zoo!
10 pm: Best friend Amy phones me, and gets pissed at the City of Chicago for not coming out. I believe her exact words were, "What, like there's an epidemic of squirrels who fell down chimneys into people's living rooms tonight? They couldn't come in TWO HOURS?" She then proceeds to tell me that: a) "what if the squirrel is in your bed right now?, b) "Charles would have suggested that you shoot the squirrel, and then you'd have blood all over your living room," c) "you don't need to get on the roof, Alison Joy Burkhardt, because you are known for hurting yourself doing stupid things. Do I need to remind you about the slip n slide knee injury?' d) "There's a f***** squirrel in your living room!" e) "Don't feed the squirrel peanut butter, Alison. What's it going to learn, but that you're willing to feed it three squares a day?!?!" e) "I was at Megan's house when you called and left me the message about the squirrel. I tried text-messaging her to let her know that there was a squirrel in your house." (We went to high school with Megan.) and f) "This one is going down as one of my favorite Alison stories - up until now my favorite Alison story has been the Unfortunate Ohio Incident. You need to blog that one."
My one regret of the evening is that I did not get a picture of the squirrel. The best I could do was locate the video on my home page, which did make me laugh until I snorted. It also made me go, "If that squirrel doesn't get out of my house, I'm going to have to move." Enjoy!
I'm just glad that my squirrel wasn't of the German variety...
Thursday, June 14, 2007
Donald Miller and A Cheap Whore
Last night I went to see Donald Miller speak at Willow Creek's Worship Conference. (Let me just insert here that I am not a Willow fan, but am a Donald Miller Fan.)A friend, who shall remain nameless, asked me to go. I enjoyed Blue Like Jazz (although I haven't found the time to read his others) and have heard him speak before. Why do I like him so much? Because he cuts through the bullshit and keeps it real. For example, and I quote, "Now, some of you think that God caused all the bad stuff in your life," he says, then puts his hand over his mouth, looks down, and continues, "although I'd wager a lot of that bad stuff is because of dumb decisions that you made..." I immediately threw my hand up in the air, pointed at him, and said to my friend, "And that's why I love Donald Miller!" He bursts our little Christian hypocrisy bubble EVERY time!!!
Anyway, said friend has a HUUUGEEE crush on Donald Miller. I told her to dress slutty, and that we were going to meet him afterwards and throw her at him like a cheap whore. (Which I repeated about 75 times, because those words almost never come out of my mouth!)
Unfortunately, a Willow staff member hauled him away, and he didn't even get to sign any books. Sad day. I told said friend that I planned to cyber-stalk him and get his personal email address for her. Princess (aka Nancy Drew), we might need your assistance.
Chicago Drivers at the 4-way Stop
Chicago drivers can move like nobodies business. It's an artform, really. Non Chicagoans think we're crazy drivers, and I am on the fence. I still whole-heartedly believe Chicago drivers are absolutely bananas and scare the crap out of me, sometimes, but I am becoming more and more of one every day.With the exception of the 4-way stop. Every day I am shocked and amazed at how badly Chicagoans are with a 4-way stop. Being a country girl, and only having 4-way stops in town (vs stop lights), I know how you're supposed to drive at them so that people can get through them quickly.
For example, even if it's not your turn, but someone else is going in such a direction that you can go at the same time (e.g.the car across from you is crossing the street, meaning the cars to the right and left of you MUST wait or cause an accident)...GO AT THE SAME TIME! You don't literally have to wait until the three drivers there before you have gone before you can go. In Chicago, that kind of backup can last for two hours. A 4-way stop on a major street can lead to cars being back up two and three blocks, sometimes, for several hours. On a major street leading to Lake Shore Drive, it's backed up like that pretty much all day on the weekends, and it'll take twenty minutes to get to and through the daggon stop bc of how people wait for the other three to go.
Grrr...stupid Chicago Drivers!!!
Rudeness...or am I just tired?
I'm willing to say that it may be because I'm tired that my patience has worn thin. I have probably gotten an average of 4-5 hours of sleep every night this week. Considering I do not have children, that's unacceptable!! =)
This morning I was standing in line in Panera, to get a bagel (ended up with Cinnamon Crunch because Asiago Cheese was sold out - furthering my theory that it could just be me in a bad mood) and a salad for lunch. A woman standing in line behind me was violating two of my restaurant rules: a) standing much too close to me, and b) talking WAY too loudly to her child.
She was holding the child, so his ear was about 3 inches from her mouth - there's NO NEED TO SHOUT! I liken this to people on the 'el' or metra who talk heinously loud on their cell phones. When they start talking about the sex or drugs they had last night, that's when I want to paint a smirk on my face, grab their phone and say, "Is there even anybody on the other end of the line?"
When it was my turn to order, this woman then follows me to the counter and continues to stand about 2 inches behind me. Panera is like the airport checkin counter - you wait at the end of the staunchens until an employee says, "next customer." She was standing so close to me that I couldn't even turn around and walk away when I was done, I had to step to the side, then turn around walk away.
THEN, as I was leaving, she was, again, right behind me. I hold the door for her as I stepped through, to pass the door off to her. Instead, she breezes on through (child is walking, now) and then proceeds to stand there and wait for her son, who got sidetracked by his reflection in the window. This lasted for probably 30 seconds. Part of me was like, "I kind of want to let this door go and knock the kid down so she realizes what a be-yotch she is being right now!!!!" But I decided to find some satisfaction in the self-righteousness of realizing that I was better than she was at not hurting her child. lol
Again, I maintain that all of this may be due to me being tired, cranky, and not having yet walked to Starbucks for my morning coffee....
This morning I was standing in line in Panera, to get a bagel (ended up with Cinnamon Crunch because Asiago Cheese was sold out - furthering my theory that it could just be me in a bad mood) and a salad for lunch. A woman standing in line behind me was violating two of my restaurant rules: a) standing much too close to me, and b) talking WAY too loudly to her child.
She was holding the child, so his ear was about 3 inches from her mouth - there's NO NEED TO SHOUT! I liken this to people on the 'el' or metra who talk heinously loud on their cell phones. When they start talking about the sex or drugs they had last night, that's when I want to paint a smirk on my face, grab their phone and say, "Is there even anybody on the other end of the line?"
When it was my turn to order, this woman then follows me to the counter and continues to stand about 2 inches behind me. Panera is like the airport checkin counter - you wait at the end of the staunchens until an employee says, "next customer." She was standing so close to me that I couldn't even turn around and walk away when I was done, I had to step to the side, then turn around walk away.
THEN, as I was leaving, she was, again, right behind me. I hold the door for her as I stepped through, to pass the door off to her. Instead, she breezes on through (child is walking, now) and then proceeds to stand there and wait for her son, who got sidetracked by his reflection in the window. This lasted for probably 30 seconds. Part of me was like, "I kind of want to let this door go and knock the kid down so she realizes what a be-yotch she is being right now!!!!" But I decided to find some satisfaction in the self-righteousness of realizing that I was better than she was at not hurting her child. lol
Again, I maintain that all of this may be due to me being tired, cranky, and not having yet walked to Starbucks for my morning coffee....
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
Things All Over My Truck
Last night I was in Northbrook, and started out in a Starbucks parking lot. I was on the phone, and hadn't left my truck yet. I see some teenage boys climb out of an SUV parked next to me, and about five seconds later, hear/feel the back end of my truck jerk. I look up and hear one of the boys point at my truck and say, "You hit that, man! It's over here!" <"Over here referring to a football.>So I step out of my truck, bc I'm concerned that there's a big dent (it hit me that hard) or that my tailpipe is still intact. The boys start running across a VERY busy street. I pick up their football (my truck is fine) and say, "Hey! Guys! Did you just throw this and it hit my truck?" They ignored me and RAN across the second part of the street. That's when I yelled, "Hey! Don't throw a football at my truck and then run away!" But they totally did. So I climbed back in my truck and resumed my conversation.
About two minutes later a woman
When I came out to my car after my appt...I found cicadas all over it. I was like, "Cicadas, NO!" trying to get them off my truck. I was very careful in opening the door, bc I didn't want them to climb or fly inside. I called a friend and was like, "We don't currently have them in the city, and I don't want to single-handedly be responsible for bringing cicadas in who will mate and drop eggs back in our soil to re-birth in 17 years!!!!
Monday, June 11, 2007
Cicadas, Schmicadas
So the cicadas aren't in the city of Chicago, although they are annoying the smack out of the suburbanites. Apparently they go where the new trees are, and there are no new trees in the city. Hence, I have not laid eyes on a cicada, yet.Until, this morning, that is.
I was driving on the expressway, with my window rolled down. I was very groggy due to a Sudafed and the sun beating down on my face. All of a sudden, I see something flying at me (it looks like the size of a large dark rock) and it smacks me in the face and ricochets off of me. About 3 seconds later, a GINORMOUS bug smacks into my windshield and gets stuck in the windshield wiper. It's so big and so messy I'm afraid to turn the wiper on to unlodge it. I get back to my office, and see a bug as big as my thumb laying on the seat next to me, still a little alive. I all of a sudden say, "I think that's a cicada!" Turns out, I was correct.
I can't experience new things in normal ways...I have to get smacked in the face with them. Flying Fish story, anyone?
Sunday, June 10, 2007
Isn't she a cutie?
This is the little girl that I've been babysitting for some on the weekends. She's such a cutie!! This was in mid-swing at the park, so it's a bit blurry and she was definitely looking at me like, "what are you doing with that thing in your hand!?!?" lololWe had fun last night. We went for a long walk, and she was jabbering a mile a minute in her little baby talk. She's at the stage where she knows exactly what she's saying, and she's totally having a conversation with me...too funny. Then when I rolled her stroller into the park, she let out a scream so loud that I stopped the stroller and ran around to see her face, in alarm. It was a scream of joy - I LOVED it!! Then as I roll her over to the baby swings, she started reaching up for them and giggling slash baby jabbering. She is so stinkin' cute!!! Then we played with bubbles and went home to play with her toys. She associates me with clapping her hands and saying, "Yay Rosie!!" When she either gets a puzzle piece where it belongs or she pushes a button on a noisemaker toy, so she kept sitting there doing something, clapping her hands and singing some baby jabber similar to "yay, rosie!" She is a joy.
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
Evan Almighty
Last night I saw a pre-screening of Evan Almighty. This movie was, in a word, delightful. You must go see it, and take your whole family.If you've seen Bruce Almighty, you may be saying, "take my whole family? No way!" Trust me - you'll be glad you did. They purposely made this one family-friendly, and there are SO many good themes in it to talk about with your kids. Some of the themes are environmental, using your power for good, systemic political issues, family (both quality time and believing in/supporting your spouse), and having faith when God leads you in a direction that society deems 'crazy.'
Not to mention, it's rip-your-sides-open hilarious. Steve Carell, Lauren Graham, the guy who plays Andy from The Office, Christopher Guest, Morgan Freeman and Molly Shannon all grace the screen for us. It's Great!
Bird-warning for Nicole Esmon - you are going to freak out when you see this movie...there are birds...and lots of them. They act in ways that may cause you to have an anxiety slash panic attack, so I suggest you put Alex on a strict "tell me when I can uncover my eyes" policy as soon as you see the birds. There are two or three scenes in the first 30 minutes that will freak you out - after Evan owns his inner Noah, the birds are all good. =)
Master of Higher Ed Administration
This is a new degree program at North Park through the school of nonprofit business management. I decided to enroll in it, and am taking my first classes this fall. I'm taking four quad classes, which results in two regular classes. This may be aggressive...but I'm realizing it's primarily classes I have already had at an undergrad and graduate level. So I don't think it will be too difficult for me. I am curious to see how my learning in this arena will have changed since I've worked for awhile in non-profit management.
Monday, June 4, 2007
Paris n Lindsay n Britney
Did you watch the MTV Movie Awards? I don't typically watch MTV's award shows, bc I think they are stupid. But I love the movie awards for the spoofs that they produce on the movies. This year's was a letdown, bc they let viewers create their own spoofs...and let's face it, when you don't have an unlimited budget and brilliant comedic actors who will act in them for you, they pretty much suck except to the friends and family of said video-makers, who understand their quirky inside jokes.
But that wasn't my biggest disappointment. I was APPALLED at how Sarah Silverman, Dane Cook and Sacha Baren Cohen humiliated Paris, Lindsay and Britney. Paris was at the awards show, right before she checked into jail. In Sarah's opening comments, she said something about Paris having to go to jail this week, and the entire audience erupted into cheers and jeers (including the celebrities). Then Sarah went on to say something really, really crude and just plain mean. It was humiliating. If Paris didn't realize it before, it became painfully clear to her how Hollywood feels about her: she was their laughingstock last night. The looks on celebrities faces while they laughed at her expense was horrifying. I was literally sick to my stomach. Later on in the show, Dane Cook said that Paris was so offended by Sarah's remarks that she left early and went ahead and checked into jail, which caused a whole other eruption of cheers and jeers, and Paris looked like she was going to cry.
Later on, Sacha Baron Cohen accepted an award for Borat and made a statement about how Borat would have been there to accept, except that fame had gotten to him and he needed to "relax" in rehab. Previously this week, Borat had crashed his horse and carriage into the fence around Jew-town, and was under the influence of fermented horse urine...and that they found a more-than-legal stash of rufies in the backseat. Then Borat was so freaked out about it all, he went to a barber shop and had his mustache shaved off. Again, this was all met with horrifying cheers and jeers from the entire audience.
I am no fan of Lindsay or Britney, and certainly not of Paris Hilton...but they are human beings, and let's face it, they are little girls deep down. They are all extremely young and have made horrible choices in their lives. But everybody makes mistakes, and they live in an environment that promotes this type of behavior instead of helping it. They did not deserve this sick humiliation, and it certainly won't help their problem. As my friend Erin said, "what about the people who were supposed to be looking out for these girls? what about the people who sold them the drugs and alcohol and who encouraged this behavior? they aren't going to jail or being publicly humiliated." Hopefully, reflection on last night will help Paris, Lindsay and Britney get the reality checks they need to start taking responsibility for their lives and better themselves. They've got their whole lives ahead of them, and I wish only the best for them.
But that wasn't my biggest disappointment. I was APPALLED at how Sarah Silverman, Dane Cook and Sacha Baren Cohen humiliated Paris, Lindsay and Britney. Paris was at the awards show, right before she checked into jail. In Sarah's opening comments, she said something about Paris having to go to jail this week, and the entire audience erupted into cheers and jeers (including the celebrities). Then Sarah went on to say something really, really crude and just plain mean. It was humiliating. If Paris didn't realize it before, it became painfully clear to her how Hollywood feels about her: she was their laughingstock last night. The looks on celebrities faces while they laughed at her expense was horrifying. I was literally sick to my stomach. Later on in the show, Dane Cook said that Paris was so offended by Sarah's remarks that she left early and went ahead and checked into jail, which caused a whole other eruption of cheers and jeers, and Paris looked like she was going to cry.
Later on, Sacha Baron Cohen accepted an award for Borat and made a statement about how Borat would have been there to accept, except that fame had gotten to him and he needed to "relax" in rehab. Previously this week, Borat had crashed his horse and carriage into the fence around Jew-town, and was under the influence of fermented horse urine...and that they found a more-than-legal stash of rufies in the backseat. Then Borat was so freaked out about it all, he went to a barber shop and had his mustache shaved off. Again, this was all met with horrifying cheers and jeers from the entire audience.
I am no fan of Lindsay or Britney, and certainly not of Paris Hilton...but they are human beings, and let's face it, they are little girls deep down. They are all extremely young and have made horrible choices in their lives. But everybody makes mistakes, and they live in an environment that promotes this type of behavior instead of helping it. They did not deserve this sick humiliation, and it certainly won't help their problem. As my friend Erin said, "what about the people who were supposed to be looking out for these girls? what about the people who sold them the drugs and alcohol and who encouraged this behavior? they aren't going to jail or being publicly humiliated." Hopefully, reflection on last night will help Paris, Lindsay and Britney get the reality checks they need to start taking responsibility for their lives and better themselves. They've got their whole lives ahead of them, and I wish only the best for them.
More Movie Reviews
This one was fun!! If you have kids, I think they need to be a bit older and familiar with popular fairy tales to get most of the jokes...although Puss n Boots and Donkey are sure to please all on their own. There were a couple of rather 'riskee' jokes in there, but I seem to recall feeling the same way about Shrek 1 and 2. Not sure I would re-spend the $10 to see it, but will definitely watch it again when it comes on TV.
I have one phrase, "Oh My Gosh!!!" Truthfully, I was afraid that this one had been hyped up so much that I would be let down. That happens to me, a lot. I get these ridiculously high expectations bc of the hype. But I so enjoyed it. It was beautifully cast, too. I don't watch American Idol, so I was unfamiliar with Jennifer Hudson's talent. WHOA - how did she not win?!?!!? That woman is phenominal and can sing circles around Beyonce. I loved Jamie in it (thought he was perfectly cast) and Eddie Murphy was brilliant. I had flashbacks to his album he recorded in the 80s that didn't do so well. Anyway - I might have to own this one.This week I am going to a pre-screening of Evan Almighty when it comes to Chicago. I will post my thoughts.
Saturday, June 2, 2007
The Starter Wife
a new show on LifeTime or USA...not sure which, starring Debra Messing, is my new favorite thing this summer!!! That, and the fact that My Boys is coming back for season two in July-ish.
Check it out....
Check it out....
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