Carnivale Chicago

One of the great things about Chicago is its many fabulous restaurants. I don't go to many of them, because they are quite pricey. I indulged on Easter, however, and went to Carnivale with my roommates. It was the best meal I have ever had in my life, and I felt like I was eating a Top Chef meal. If you are in Chicago, you have to check it out. Take a quick look at the Decor - it's so fun! I want to decorate my house like this! It's impossible to be in Carnivale and not feel happy.

New Bag

I love this bag. I have loved it since I first saw it at Target. I bought it this weekend and have already received several compliments.

Jumping out of my skin

As a child, did you ever think that when you became an adult you would know everything and thus not need to 'learn' anything else? I did.

I've had a rough past couple of days. I've had a few different experiences where I've really felt devalued. I've been treated badly because of my race, age and gender, I've been cut off and not allowed to finish speaking in group projects, and have had some other people in my life not value some things important to me in the last couple weeks. Many of these situations have happened in work settings, where it's not appropriate for me to stand up for myself.

I also realized today that men only valuing me for what I might offer, physically, is another form of devaluation to me. It's probably the one I find most offensive. I've been so confused and frustrated the last two weeks due to all of the above that I've only been getting about 4-5 hours of fitful, restless sleep each night. I've also found it nearly impossible to pray or journal for almost two weeks.

All of that added up to my biting the head off a fellow student in my night class tonight. My reaction to how she treated me was totally justified, but my physical reaction threw me for a loop. I was so angry, I was shaking. A physical reaction to an emotional issue. I've got to learn how to handle feeling or being devalued by others.

That got me to thinking about my friends. I can get so hurt by close friends when I feel devalued by their actions. I've never really been able to articulate that it makes me feel devalued, and that I need them to hear that I feel devalued by their actions instead of getting angry and defensive. Listening to me does not equal agreeing with me or changing how they do things, but it does equal respecting me. I can't expect others to value me if I don't value myself enough to share when I feel devalued.

In the words of our campus pastor, Judy Howard Peterson, "I want to experience the peace that makes no sense," and stop feeling like I'm about to jump out of my skin.

Family Fun

My mom and her brother, Jim. Can't tell they are related, can you?!?
My dad and nephew Brandon.
My beautiful sister, Yvonne. We are really, really close.
My aunt Lori (Jim's wife) and their daughter Jill. Jill's one of my favorite people. =) As are Lori and Jim.
Aunt Lori and Jill's son, Tucker. He's such a cutie pie and so much fun!!!
Jill and her husband, Rob. Doesn't Tucker look just like him?!?!

More fun from Missouri

Dylan

I realized that I haven't blogged about my friends Toni and Jeff. Their second child, Dylan, was born on December 17. Later that day, he was sent to St. Louis Children's Hospital with pneumonia, and he just returned home last week due to some other complications while he was there. I got to meet him for the first time last night, and spend some time with Toni, Jeff and their 5-year-old, Madison. Madison is always a fun experience, and Dylan was so cuddly and cute!! He's a happy little guy, considering he's likely still in some pain due to an infection and surgery on his foot (complications.)

My First Day Back In Missouri

I am in Missouri right now, visiting the parents. They live way back in the woods, and it's gorgeous - kind of like a cabin resort. I got some great shots. Enjoy. =)

Aren't my parent's dogs so cute? They are siblings, and are forever 'wallering' around.
Here they are, knocking my mom over. I died laughing.
Here are the buffalo skulls from my dad and brother's hunt in December.
These photos are from the grounds behind their house. It's beautiful!!




These are some raccoon tracks we found back in the woods.
This is a photo of me, Mom, Dad and my neice Emily.

Foolishness: Oh the Struggles of Being Single

A couple of my girlfriends and I love to talk about the foolishness we experience from being single. These conversations mainly revolve around the foolishness of males who try to step to us in inappropriate ways. For example, I am often approached and/or touched inappropriately by men when I am out. By often, I mean maybe once every three months. Let's face it, I'm getting old, and I am turning into a homebody.

At any rate, I expect church to be a safe place. An 'inappropriate-free' zone, if you will. Yesterday, I learned that I have not seen it all. After this experience, it may be that I have.

I was greeted at the door by a man that I have met a couple of other times. He has always seemed really nice, and was actually someone I was interested in pursuing a friendship with. When I walked over to him, he took my hand and his eyes immediately traveled south and stayed there. We had a conversation that lasted probably 3-5 minutes, and not once did his eyes travel anywhere other than my chest and my hips. He never made eye contact, nor did he let go of my hand.

After church, a friend who was with me was like, "Yeah, Alleykat's got a fan club. That dude was checking you out!" I was so grossed out. First of all, I'm a person. Secondly, I can see where your eyes are looking, and it's not at my face. I find nothing more offensive than a man approaching me in such a fashion. Get to know me, then tell me you find me attractive. To have that happen in church did not make me feel attractive, it made me feel gross. Ugh.

Amy's engaged!!

Check out her ring.